Newborn-Motherhood

December 18, 2010

First of all, thanks to all of the folks out there who have been sending us happy messages, kind words, funny ecards, helping hands (dishes, groceries, gift baskets, take-out, etc.) and overall vibes of excitement and interest in our new family.  We are overwhelmed by all of the love out there!

So, it has taken me a couple days to be up to much outside of taking care of Finlay and myself.  I really want to share a bit about my take on the labour and birth.

I was getting pretty anxious for the baby to arrive.  I went to the acupuncturist on Monday evening and she said something that made me decide to just tell the baby that tomorrow was going to be its birthday.

I talked to the baby and told it about the cake I would make it and about how it would share a birthday with its great-grandfather and that it was supposed to be a stormy day which is how I always pictured its first day.

Well, to my relief and excitement, contractions began at about 4am on Tuesday.  I waited an hour to be sure and then woke up Tyler so that he could be in on the excitement.  I said, "Tyler, it's Chick's birthday today!"

We slept through the rest of the morning.  We got up and started making Pumpkin-Chocolate Chip cupcakes for the birthday.  We tried to finish up some cleaning and Tyler set-up the bed and the tub for the labour and birth.  We called the midwife and went to an appointment mid-morning and I was only 1 cm dilated but she agreed that labour had begun.  She recommended we relax and enjoy the day because we could be at this stage for a day or two.  I smiled and said, "Today is Chick's birthday, we'll call you later with updates."  And home we went.

We ate lunch as soon as we were in and decided to nap as neither of us had had a very good sleep that night. We had only been in bed for a few minutes when my water broke and active labour began.  At this point, I remember jumping into the shower and shouting for Tyler to call Uta and Tanesha and then I went into what is called "labour-land."  I have no timeline here and very little memory of it.

I know that the mid-wife and the doula were there shortly and my cheer-leading team was quickly assembled.  There was Tyler and his massages and offering me a glass full of water or coconut water and many encouraging words.  There was Tanesha with lots of yay-yous and suggestions for dealing with the sensations.  There was Uta giving me updates on how I was doing and offering homeopathics and direction for my mind-body connection.

I kept thinking that every contraction was one more closer to meeting the baby.  I kept telling myself "I can do this.  I am made for this.  This is hard work but there is no turning back now!"  

Uta told us the following day that if we had gone with a doctor in hospital we would have had to have a c-section.  The baby was big and I am small.  I progressed through the pushing really slowly and the H-bomb (going to hospital) was mentioned that night.  At that point, I really had to focus and put in every ounce of energy I had left.  

I really fell into doubt near the end, though.  I was more tired than I had ever been in my life.  I was really unsure if I could finish what I'd started.  But then everyone in the room got really excited and there was a second midwife, Sarah.  Uta and Sarah were warming blankets and getting out their equipment and Tanesha started to really give some more serious direction and I told myself "this is it - you are having a baby now!"

We got to see the baby be born and a lot was going through my mind!  One thought I couldn't help but mention was - "holy cow that is a big baby!"

The baby was given a rub-down and the midwifes started to say "Tyler, what is it?" (referring to the baby's sex).  "It's a boy?" he said with some doubt.  "YES!" the room said back.  

He didn't cry at all.  He was just squirming and looking around.  He was looking at me!  I couldn't hold him though; my arms were completely useless with exhaustion.  I started to go cross-eyed and couldn't focus on anything. 

After some juice and birthday cake and a shower I was ready to cuddle with my son.  We named him Finlay McKinnon Grant.  Finlay came about in a discussion on a CBC Radio 3 program, which is a story on its own.  McKinnon is my mother's maiden name and Grant is Tyler's mother's last name.  A strong Scottish name for a little boy with some special Scottish background.

During these past days I can't help but beam with joy in my little miracle, but also in the elation that I did it - I did a natural labour and birth at home, just like I wanted to, with 300,000 other women around the world on December 14, 2010.  I am part of something really special and I am really proud of my experience.  I will cherish it forever!  And the best part of all is the outcome; a healthy baby!

lyndze